Wasting Words

Should I? Where to begin? need more ideas !

Pernah gak kalian lihat orang mengacungkan jari tengahnya, mungkin di film, di tv, atau berita, atau mungkin kalian pernah melakukannya juga untuk orang lain. Pernah kalian sadar gak, bahwa ketika ngacungin jari tengah telunjuk kalian mengarah kemana? bawah.. sadar atau tidak, jari tengah itu berisi kebencianmu, dan telunjuk itu adalah kehidupanmu. Kebencian cuma membawamu kebawah, bahkan tidak bisa membawamu ke arah yang sejajar dengan yang kamu benci. Sekarang, dengan jari tengah kalian yang masih diatas, coba naikkan juga jari telunjuk kalian, kemana arahnya sekarang? keatas. Bawa kebencianmu kearah yang membuatmu lebih baik. Berdamailah dengan mereka. Heartbreak Can Be A Good Business.

When work feels ovewhelming, just remember that you are gonna to die

Hello, hai again, Ilham Disini.  Goshh.... Udah lama ga updet blog, cuma mau kasih kabar sudah genap 2 tahun lebih 5 hari tinggal di Tangerang, lohh 5 hari kok genap sihh, gimana sih anda... genap tuh dua, empat, enam, pernah belajar ga sih.... ga krasa ya rasanya udah sekian lama berjuang dengan kekuatan, loh berjuang apaan, wong juga biasa-biasa ae, kok kayanya sedih juga sih rasanya mau tau gak kenapa? lah ko mau tau sih emangnya anda siapa? Anda bukannya yg ngisi soundtracknya ada apa dengan cinta ya? Emangnya cinta kenapa sih? Cinta kan anaknya Uya Kuya... Jangan berlebihan deh... Kuyang-kuyangin yaa... ih gak jelas banget sih, gak fokus banget sih, gila ya gini nih kalo udah kelamaan gak nulis padahal juga ngetik .. jadi gimana sih, kok plin-plan? Mending dengerin videonya Didi Kempot deh, lagi booming lagi, lagu lama serasa lagu baru..... Cidro, Sewu Kuto, Banyu Langit..... BOOOM XHAAAKAAA LAKAAAA BOOOM......  mau nulis apa tapi bingung, yaudah deh biarin mengalir...

 This place is full of my belongings.. But I don't feel like home The blanket is tidy, the mattress is big enough for two.. But i'm cold and left alone Getting ready for my late night bath.. I'm sitting here like a sponge letting everything soaks.. Listening to the water flows. I wish it was the smell of petrichor instead.. I'm sure it wasn't.. It was more like a dried tears hidden somewhere beneath some ingrown hairs.... As i said to myself.. It is hard, it is hard.. It was still my choice to make.. And submitting myself with idea of not feeling lonely anymore.. On my nights and whatnots.. It was still the best decision i've made.. Even if it kills me But afterall, my journey was never easy and i made it through so far.. Though bones break, and sweat sweats, and laughter slowly fades.. And then i saw him.. And he was me, only older and wise.. He was me, only thinner and less bitter.. The ghost in front of me smirks.. The ...

i want this now even more than i've wanted before. i dont know what to do i'm so lost. i'm so tired and i dont know what im talking about anymore but i  want  this. you just remember that.

and the saddest part is feeling happy but knowing that we're not meant to be.